Reasons why I love my mother
Mom: Hey...Me: What?
Mom: Don't go having unprotected sex, now...
Me: Yea, that's not hard, considering that I don't have sex.
Mom: What about Paul?
Me: What about him? He's Catholic! All we do is hold hands.
Mom: Ohhh. Good!
And I'm sure she did a victory dance after I got off the phone.
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